I don't know how else to address this issue other than being completely honest. I have been married since Sept, and we had a beautiful baby girl in April. I am committed to never breaking this promise of marriage, and always try to tackle our problems no matter how difficult. What is a frightening occurrence, is where I become physically aggressive. It hasn't happened often, nor do I strike her, but I don't want to make excuses about it either. I am ashamed for it happening, and I don't want it to happen. I'm not sure what details would be useful to know first, but I wanted to seek fellowship in my genuine search for help. God bless
This is a very serious issue. It is not acceptable to behave towards one's wife or anybody else in this way. The next time this happens, and there will be a next time, the consequences may be far more serious. Growing-up with a violent father will be traumatising to your child. I will pray for you as others have said they will; howver, you MUST seek professional help for this issue. Either go to see your GP who can advise or look at what services of whichever trust's area you live in. Don't delay or ponder, do it for everyone's sake.
None of us is perfect. We all carry baggage from our past. Something in your past taught you a wrong response to certain emotions. To honor and love both God and your wife, you are called upon to take every possible step to overcome this pattern of behavior. On the one hand I say do not feel condemned, but on the other hand I say you must re-learn. In addition to counseling, you need a sincere desire to change and you need to spend time talking with God (prayer) about this. Also I recommend reading these specific Bible passages every morning and every evening for the next 60 days (or longer, if you feel so led): Gal 5:16 But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. Gal 5:17 For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. Gal 5:18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. Gal 5:19 Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, Gal 5:20 idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, Gal 5:21 envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. Gal 5:22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, Gal 5:23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Gal 5:24 And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Gal 5:25 If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit. Gal 5:26 Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another. Mat 7:17 So, every healthy tree bears good fruit, but the diseased tree bears bad fruit. Mat 7:18 A healthy tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a diseased tree bear good fruit. Mat 7:19 Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Mat 7:20 Thus you will recognize them by their fruits. Mat 7:21 “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Col 3:1 If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Col 3:2 Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. Col 3:3 For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. Col 3:4 When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. Col 3:5 Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. Col 3:6 On account of these the wrath of God is coming. Col 3:7 In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. Col 3:8 But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Col 3:9 Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices Col 3:10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Col 3:11 Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all. Col 3:12 Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, Col 3:13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Col 3:14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. Col 3:15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Col 3:16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. Col 3:17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.