How many kids would you want to ideally have

Discussion in 'Family, Relationships, and Single Life' started by bwallac2335, Oct 28, 2019.

  1. bwallac2335

    bwallac2335 Well-Known Member

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    Ideally I would love to have a house full. I would want at bare minimum three up to I don't know maybe 8 or how many God would bless me with. I think one thing to help take back the culture and the world is for Christians to start having more kids.
     
  2. Botolph

    Botolph Well-Known Member

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    Be careful what you wish for. Children are the roses in the family, so whilst they are a great blessing they don't come without thorns.
     
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  3. anglican74

    anglican74 Well-Known Member Anglican

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    As many as possible, goes without saying... Children are such a great blessing, and while the secular culture tries to scare us with poverty in the case of children, I once reflected on the fact that I had never heard of any family becoming homeless of going on the street "because they had too many children!"
     
  4. bwallac2335

    bwallac2335 Well-Known Member

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    I already have one so I know a bit of what I am getting myself into.
     
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  5. Magistos

    Magistos Active Member Anglican

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    Three, which is what I have.
    The family feels complete, and my wife feels the same way.
     
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  6. Liturgyworks

    Liturgyworks Well-Known Member Anglican

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    I think three or four would be a good number, as a minimum, but more would be a blessing. Jacob-Rees Mogg, a man whose cultural values I admire, has six. Fr. Josiah Trenham, an Antiochian Orthodox priest in Southern California who is an outspoken critic of abortion and homosexuality, has eight or nine. He remarks they make an odd sight, with him wearing a black Greek Orthodox-style cassock (which looks quite different from the style of cassock preferred by Anglicans, Roman Catholics and also Syriac Orthodox), followed by a veritable parade of children. And he is very happy. My Assyrian friend Fr. Ephrem I think is up to five now.

    There is a common theme here and it is the rejection of contraception. I myself don’t believe in contraception. The main reason why I might not have any children is I have not ruled out the possibility of becoming a monk.
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2019
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  7. bwallac2335

    bwallac2335 Well-Known Member

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    My girlfriend and I, which are talking about marriage, both don't want contraception. We don't want it for different reasons. She also wants 4 kids. The only problem facing us is that we will at least be 28 for her at marriage and 35 for me. Age might be a factor on how many kids we can have.
     
  8. Lowly Layman

    Lowly Layman Well-Known Member

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    Ideally, however many God sees fit to bless one with...Which is why contraception is such a poor choice for Christians (excluding those who have medical reasons for doing so).
     
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  9. Stalwart

    Stalwart Well-Known Member Anglican

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    I just had my 2nd child born, a little baby daughter (we are exhausted and thankful and blessed). For your wife to start at 28 isn't too late at all. You have until she's 40 before any health risks develop. God be with you on the journey!

    As to the OP, while I too have my "ideal number" (4...), I've also learned from history that it is dangerous to direct your family towards "family planning". The secular culture has turned conjugal relations into recreation, completely divorced from new life, which is something I seek to avoid at all costs. Don't want to have children? Don't have conjugal relations. It's a tough pill to swallow, one I am still struggling with, but I know what the right answer is, and will continue praying to God to enlighten my wife and me with greater understanding, as I do not want to orient my soul with the heathens.
     
    Last edited: Oct 29, 2019
  10. bwallac2335

    bwallac2335 Well-Known Member

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    Health problems might not increase until 40 but fertility decreases at 35. I would be fine with 7 or even more.
     
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  11. S. DeVault

    S. DeVault New Member

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    If I got to choose, four. Two girls, two boys
     
  12. Cooper

    Cooper Active Member Anglican

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    Get your brood when you are young.
    Spend your hoary days in prayer.

    :tiphat:
     
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  13. mark fisher

    mark fisher Member Anglican

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    maybe 4-6
     
  14. Clayton

    Clayton Active Member

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    Three at least, probably four or five. I’d welcome as many as I could manage, though my youthful prodigality has left me with far fewer on account of my late start.
     
  15. Br. Thomas

    Br. Thomas Active Member

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    My wife and I are both now 70. We had two sons. We lost a daughter. Health issues arose for my wife, so she could no longer conceive. So, two it is. I grew up in a social culture that was filled with naysayers and doomsdayers. Only have two to replace you and wife was the common thing heard. That way, there would be zero-population growth. Well, so much for that philosophy. Sex outside marriage became a social issue and very open amongst my era. Woodstock, Vietnam, protests and free-love dominated the scene. Abortion became a socially accepted form of birth-control.

    We are perfectly fine with two sons in our lives. One son is married with a step-son. The other is unmarried and will remain so. One can pontificate about extremes one way or another on this matter. I am perfectly fine with what we have been dealt. God sees fit to guide us on our journey of Life.
     
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  16. PDL

    PDL Well-Known Member Anglican

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    With hindsight I'd say none. Sorry, just kidding:D

    I have three and love them dearly.

    I don't think there is an ideal number. It has to vary with couples and their circumstances. We didn't plan how many children we had. Three just came along. After the birth of our third child we did think with three children, full-time jobs and and household to run we had enough on our plate. However, a fourth child wouldn't have been regretted but as loved as the other three. Neither did we have any regrets that no more came along.
     
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  17. Traveler

    Traveler Member

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    Ideally, three. Unfortunately, my experience with family matters has hardly been ideal. It looks like I'm one and done.