Kissing a girlfriend

Discussion in 'Family, Relationships, and Single Life' started by bwallac2335, Aug 16, 2019.

  1. bwallac2335

    bwallac2335 Well-Known Member

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    In possibly dating again this question has arisen. Is the kissing of a girlfriend or boyfriend a sin?
     
  2. anglican74

    anglican74 Well-Known Member Anglican

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    Of course not! The only thing that's wrong is 4th base, outside of marriage...
     
  3. bwallac2335

    bwallac2335 Well-Known Member

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    I am leaning towards anything that brings on lust. I have failed in the past and had premarital sex. I don't want to do that again. My priest said I had a scriptural reason for divorce and that remarriage is ok for me. He is ACNA. I don't want to mess up again. I don't want to sin. I don't think I could personally handle anything but a quick peck on the cheek without lusting. I am very attracted to this young lady.
     
  4. anglican74

    anglican74 Well-Known Member Anglican

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    See the thing is, it is very hard to resist going from 1st base to 4th base... That's why I should have been more clear, that kissing itself is not wrong, whilst going all the way in itself is wrong... But all throughout, from 1st base to 4th base, lusting is wrong, especially if you have prior issues with brokenness which make you vulnerable, so I'd say you should try to stay away from occasions of sin
     
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  5. Magistos

    Magistos Active Member Anglican

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    Kissing a girl/boyfriend is certainly not a sin (unless of course you are forcing yourself on them - that's a whole other kettle of fish). Now, the next (implicit) step in your question is - does this cause lustful thoughts? If so, that's obviously a sin (as Jesus said). Please separate desire from LUST. You can desire someone, but lust - undressing them mentally, having detailed thoughts, etc., that's a whole other step. You have crossed over into impugning their personhood (the sin in your heart Jesus talks about). That said, if you personally feel that you cannot tolerate something that might lead you to sin, then don't do it. You set that boundary for yourself.

    I would also add that temptation is not sin - I think a lot of people mix that up, and miss a mentally and emotionally freeing element. Jesus was tempted, but did not sin. Desire can/could be temptation. Where you go mentally or physically after that could be sin.

    I would also recommend the short Word and Table podcast on "Scandal" dated from 3/28/19. It's about can you sin without doing something wrong and how we care of each other's consciences and still seek the truth.
     
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  6. bwallac2335

    bwallac2335 Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for the responses. This is the first time in a long time that I have felt desire for a woman. I am very careful not to lust and perhaps I should speak with her about it tonight. She is also very devout and might just appreciate the conversation.